Problems… big or small

It took me a long time to realize that to each person their problems, no matter how small, seems really big. I’ve had a challenging life. Sure, things could be worse but life hasn’t exactly been easy. So from quite a young age I’ve learned how to cope. I’ve learned how to put on “that” face so the world never knew what I was going through. I do share my concerns and anger with my close friends but hardly every my sadness. So for me, when people would talk about a problem that seemed so trivial. I’d always say (or sometimes think to myself)… Suck it up!

I was never coddled and tough love was the theme in my life. But as I grow more mature (don’t want to say older!), I realize that tough love may not always be the answer. Especially when it comes to people confiding in me about their problems. People don’t always want advice and they definitely don’t want to be belittled. In fact, I’ve come to believe, it is and has been so wrong of me to be dismissive of people’s problems, just because in my frame of mind they didn’t quite meet my standards. Problems are problems… whether big or small. What might seem to me a non-issue, might be a big deal for someone else.

So I’ve learned over the years to empathize and even if I don’t readily understand, I try to think how I may feel if someone thought I was being silly about my problems. I’m glad I realized this.

Dec 5, 2016

Today I was talking to coworker who started ranting about how some people got recognized in our monthly floor address when they really didn’t deserve it. He went on and on about how one guy didn’t do anything much, is very difficult to work with and only closed one deal, which he stole from another manager and managed to close because of his assisstant. Wow!

And then he turned to me saying that even you have closed a number of deals yet you’re not being recognized and he is. I said it was ok that the other guy is being recognized and I really didn’t care that he was. But, yes I would’ve liked to be recognized as well for my achievements. Truth is, I’m not the knd of person who is envious of someone else’s success and I don’t beleive in growing at the expense of others. In fact, I would prefer it if we all learned and grew together.

compete

(found the picture on the internet, I don’t know whose quote this is)